关系——真真?假假?

人们往往喜欢为身边的关系冠上一份名词——朋友、好朋友、情人、冤家等等。真正决定那份关系的，并不是我们因“觉得“而冠上的名词，而是我们与该对象之间真正的互动、态度。。。

当你，陷入沉思

当你突然不觉得你属于一片陪你多时的土地。。。
当听一首简单的情歌是一份沉重的负担时
。。。
当平时陪你娱乐的情歌，触发你的阵阵伤感。。。
当很突然的，你以为，你已长大；但原来，你还不是。。。

10 months as a pharmacist

I finally have submitted my log books! Yeay!

Time flies. This is after how long, that I finally thought of updating my blog again...

To my friend that still loyally waiting for my continuous updates, thank you so much! However with my irregular mood in 'blogging' nowadays, I rather you drop me a quick Whats App or FaceBook message! To those friends, I think you know who you really are...

Why I didn't blog for such a long time???
Too busy? Not really...
Lost the passion? May be...
Or may be I shall say, because, my life priority has changed...?

Thanks to working life, I feel I have more to do now.

I appreciate my holiday more - it's no longer about studying (only), it's also about rest, recharging the biological battery, and getting some time to do what you really like / would like to do..

Working as a pharmacist, is not simply just carrying a title, it's about looking after another patient's, during his/her sick period, and sometimes, even when he/she is well...It's about saving life - I remembered the oncall time - you are rushing for amiodarone, salbutamol, snake antivenoms, etc, etc...

It's been almost 10 months of my official pharmacist life - especially during oncall(s), I feel sometimes that I am almost like 'Responsible Pharmacist' working in community pharmacies in UK - just that I don't have the board that displaying my name printed in bold, big, conspicuous letters - LOL! It's the time when you learn to make decision on your own, sorting priorities, multitasking, and of course - learning!

Thanks to the pharmacist's life - I start to catch up the pace, yet everyday is still offering something new to me - I suppose that's good - which means I still need to learn, continuously - CPD? Ooo...CPD! :)

Time flies, people changed, people come in, and go away from your life - continuously...who will stay, at the end? Perhaps, no one...?

Tonight is a compilation of many thoughts, over many months, in a quick glance.

To those that keeps reading, thank you so much...yet I just cannot promise, when will my next story, be?

張智霖 ChiLam - 你是如此難以忘記 Official MV

Finally an update to my blog :) Enjoy!

Be grateful when you are born 'correctly'

I am in OPD @ Out-Patient Pharmacy for almost 4 weeks! Today is the starting of my dispensing week - 'dispensing' in Malaysia means giving out the medicine(s) to the recipient, packed with the essential advice - perhaps this is a bit different from the definition regularly used in UK...

Anyway, lets say that I have survived today - and the process is actually - quite similar to the setting of community pharmacy in UK - and actually - its is similarly fun!!!

Today I met a young lady of 15 years old - with Thalassaemia  (corrent spelling???). There is no issue with mental capacity considered when I was dispensing her prescription. Her face was quite 'pucat' (Malay term for pale, white face), yet still smiling when talking to me. She's also taking her brother's prescription too. Thinking back, I wonder how much hardship that she has to endure, since young, perhaps? It's not her fault. No one wished to be born with any sort of illness, if possible, I believe...

More story to be told in OPD really. However I am grateful as the patients here, most are very considerate and patient, and has no problem to wait for sometime. Perhaps this is a bit different compared to other states. Sometimes I appreciate this as this makes my work environment has one less point to be stressful about. There are some very inconsiderate patients - yet this is very minimal - and I tried to tell myself, do not compromise your patient care to lots more others due to the bad mood caused by these relatively very few inconsiderate patients.

***

Today I met a beggar boy on the street too. He tried to get some money from me. Yet I chose to walk away.

Thinking back, I am not sure if I was wrong. I mean, he may be really in need of money. He may be really hungry...He may not. Some may say, it's his parents' fault then. I think sometimes, it's really out of our control to be born in which family. If possible, of course everyone wants to be the prince, or son of a millionaire - yet how many is/are so lucky, at the end? 

Talking about the beggar in Sabah. While some are local, some are actually descendant(s) from Indonesia or The Philippines. I am not trying to be internationally discriminative here. My point is, sometimes it's due to poverty that the child(ren) of these foreigners (which sometimes, may be illegal) have to try to look after themselves, and this happen due to the under-education or the difficulties faced by the foreigners themselves. So at the end, when these young children start to beg at the street, I am sure they must be ashamed sometimes. I wonder, how do these children perceived other people's look on them? Will they feel looked down? Not respected? Or feel like their presence are not welcomed? Are petty? Or...Will this cause them to be under-confident? Is this the reason why they feel crime is the only way to solve their problem(s)? 

And at the same time, while I am respecting and feeling that it is natural for each country to take care of their own citizens first. I sighed for the fate of these poor children. I mean, they are innocent. They do not wish to become poor, and have to beg/be bad, and finally become a burden to the society, directly or indirectly. How about the fate of those children where one of their parents may be local while the other is not? At the end, perhaps no one can answer me. I may be creating one of the most difficult question, yet only for myself, I suppose...

Remembering Daddy

I just watched a movie about a father tried to win a bear for his beloved son.

And suddenly, I thought back about daddy, too.

He used to bring me to some funfair in our hometown also. I can't remember vividly anymore - is that once? or twice? or...

Daddy used to bring us for pom-pom car and a few other entertainment also - when we're still very young, and when he was quite young, too.

Working in a pharmacy setting will sometimes remind me of daddy, too. I was about to dispense some lactulose that day, and when I saw the indication - hepatic encephalopathy - I remembered daddy once again. The day when the lactulose was not even administered...And in the in-patient pharmacy is just almost opposite to the male surgical ward...Out of a sudden, so many coincidence...

As usual, there's days when we will forget about him. And there's days when we will miss him, so, so badly...

Daddy, I love you, and I miss you.

Started as the pharmacist

Starting job as a pharmacist - just finished my second week.

In between Christmas and New Year now.

That day started to 'lapor diri' - and from there I realised people are really nice here - as what I have expected. Even the chief is quite 'down to earth' - she is the one that brought me to wander around the pharmacy department - so that I started to get to know everyone. If God will allow me to become a 'senior' or chief in some way one day - then I hope that I will become such a good chief, too. To be honest - how high a person's nose can be, anyway?

And it seems like the stuff that  I am enjoying most now - is to prepare DD (dangerous drugs - and maybe, psychotropic substances)? I may be too early in making this conclusion. We should see...

On the 26th December, I was rushing in in-patient pharmacy, making syrups and doing filling (a.k.a. dispensing). And then I sighed for a bit, I should be doing crazy shopping now if I am still in UK - Boxing Day! Anyway actually it does not really matter - to be able to work and learning to carrying responsibility and contributing back to society - is much more better than running around like a crazy man to chase for latest fashion, or actually, out-dated fashion (purely personal opinion).

That day I was talking to the 'one-and-a-half-month senior-er PRP'. I used to thought that Malaysian healthcare system is some what excellent and affordable - everything started just RM1 or RM30 - yet actually, if it comes to complicated procedures - then you still have to pay - in full, or else, well...

And to my GF, please be alright. Update me about your health progress. I know it will be devastating sometimes. KS will be with you. Your family will be with you. I will be with you, too.

Just some scribble lah while I am rushing for my counselling assessment and assignment...

Till then,
J x